Top 10 Gut-Punching Childhood Movie Deaths
Who's saying what
It says a lot about this list that most of the entries are animals and robots. I must’ve been a pretty messed up kid. Then again, I did do a fair chunk of my growing up in the 1980s.
In fact there are just three dudes on this list (no girls, because girls didn’t count in the eighties). I’ve since discovered – using statistics – that the impact of a death in movie life is inversely related to the impact of the same sort of death in real life. Here’s a graph:
Needless to say, all of the following hit me like a sledgehammer. I mean, when my grandmother died it was pretty tough, but nothing compared to these ten stabs to my tender childhood heart.
10. Little Foot’s Mum in The Land Before Time
I didn’t even like this film, and still I cried. I was eight years old at the time, and couldn’t yet express myself properly. But if I could I would’ve said something like, “F-ck f-cking dinosaurs, man.” By the time Jurassic Park came out, I was fully radicalised.
9. Hooch in Turner and Hooch
I wish they’d taken Hanks instead of Hooch. Actually, in 2013 I just generally wish that somebody would take Hanks. (Incidentally, here’s TheVine’s Deputy Editor, Marcus Teague’s twitter review of Hanks’ latest film, Cloud Atlas: “Tom Hanks and Halle Berry are freedom fighter journalist scientist savages whose several lives intersect across centuries of makeup.”)